NOAH AOC

How are your experiences with dating?

I'm guessing you mean, how are our experiences with dating and how they relate to albinism.

I once had a guy interested in me who found the paleness awfully attractive, but he was a bit creepy anyway...

I don't think albinism affects my ability to get a boyfriend or cause many problems in a relationship. However, I do sometimes feel that I rely on him because I have albinism. I hate to rely on people and it bugs me that I can't do anything to help myself. Simple things, like getting him to help with suncream, reasing small things for me on food packets, etc. Plus I can't drive so my ex felt too pressured to learn to drive.

But I've heard that a lot of people feel this sense of helplessness. A lot of partners are very supportive and understanding. I guess it's just a matter of compensating for each other's weaknesses and strengths, just as in any relationship. I think we had a thread on this a couple months ago...

SD

~ baciare è di volare ~

not me i never ben on a date cuz i was way to shy lol now im open for whatever but starting slow

I agree with SilverDragon, it's great to have a boyfriend, but I, too, feel guilty about relying on him for so many things. If somebody cares about you though, then I think they won't mind doing favors, and of course, they have to understand the limitations and responsabilities that come with dating a person with albinism. I'm lucky that I found and absolute gem, and I wouldn't trade him for the world, he really is terrific.

The number 01 Karma Chameleon

Don't feel bad about getting help from your boyfriend or girlfriend. You can do things for the other person too, and just being loving and caring and saying thank you is plenty of compensation for someone who cares for you. Besides, if you're like me, once you get married and find out how awful your husband is at some things (finances, cleaning, remembering his mom's birthday) you might find you do an awful lot more for him!

As for dating in general, I didn't date hardly at all in high school, thanks to a narrow minded community and my low self-esteem, but in college I met my husband, and we dated for almost four years before we got married. I'd say our relationship was pretty normal- just go out and have fun, or stay home and have fun .

i've never had a boyfriend either and sometimes i blame it on the way i look and by that i mena the really blonde hair and the pale skin. but i think it has more to do with your personality like me, i am really shy so i don't meet taht many guys but the guys i have become friends with like me for my personality.

I've had some good and bad experiences dating.  I don't think that there are any "certain" rules to follow other than being comfortable in your own skin.  After that everything else will follow. 

I'm going too find a nice girl with albinism. I just feel so alienated (its an incredibly rare genetic disorder, so I am justified in feeling so I suppose?) Recently I had a girl take intrest in me. I was completely shocked. This girl looks stunning and is kind.... But I simply couldn't do it. I need someone I can relate too on a completly equal wavelength, physically and psycologically.

 it's always bothered me....but only when i was "home" in italy. nobody would even try to know me, and i honestly dont blame them, i do realise that dating someone with albinism does involve a little extra "care" and "responsibility". Though it has to be said Italians are very narrow minded, superficial and ignorant.

However, whenever I was abroad, even before i started to dy my hair a little, all it took was a small touch of mascara and a little colour on my eyebrows and EVERYONE would think i was german/swedish/dutch/hungarian/etc etc etc.

90% of my relationships have been with foreign people living/working here or while i was abroad working/studying.

I have to say though....the more emotional involvement on my end, the more self conscious i get, the more worried i get....thinking things like "i don't wanna lose him/her because i.e. he/she needs to read things from afar from me". it's weird i don't know how to explain it.

 

 

 

 Well, personally i have never had much of a problem dating. Although i have been in only a  handful of real relationships  say 5 or 6 they all lasted what was a fairly long time and i didn't feel that i relied on anyone. Ive always thought of myself as somewhat of a free person so i prefer FWB's (friends with benefits). Although I am shy at times,, more often then not I am very outgoing and that tends to attract all the attention i need in the dating arena. Fortune favors the bold in this case.

I am 17 and have never had a real boyfriend. I have liked guys and i would love to blame my albinism on the fact that I have never really dated but i honestly think it is that i lack alot of self confidence just because I never have found myself really all that pretty because i look different. But i do not think the albinism plays as big of a role as i used to think it did

     God Bless

     Anna 17 GA

i am a very shy person and have never even come close to being with a girl. i guess my albinism affects my chances with girls a lot so i dont really try

I used to be very shy and my relationships showed it.  I dated one person my freshman year in high school that didn't go well because I was so shy I barely talked around him.

 My second relationship went well, we bonded a lot and became quite close because they helped me realize that I was a valuable person.  Not that we need help with that; my previous life experiences damaged my self-esteem greatly.  We won't go into them here.

My third real relationship didn't go very well at all.  I thought, because they were visually impaired as well, it would be smooth.  However, we encountered our own personal issue (shyness being mine) and it ended quickly.

 Other factors contributed to these relationship failures, but shyness and lack of self-esteem were at the forefront. 

When I started college, I became much more confident (which wasn't saying much coming from the level I was at in high school) and, as I progressed, my self-esteem grew with me.  Now, I've found myself asking people out and telling them when I have a crush.  (Once again, there were more factors here...like coming out and all that, but we'll brush past those and focus on albinism.)  I realize it's difficult, but I've found a part of myself that is beautiful (and this is quite recently) that I had to find myself.  No one can really help you with that.  You have to find the love for yourself.  Wow, I'm sounding cheesey, so I'll stop.

Ok i don't lke sounding so harsh to people but i hear the same thing from alot of people with albinism. "I'm to shy and have low self esteme. " The short answer is, "grow a pair..." No one is going to make you feel better or give you confidence so go do it for yourself. Besides the forst that will happen is they say no, and its not the end of the world believe me. Once you start dating and interacting with people yourconfidence will grow and you'll get better at it. Guys, a girl will not take a second look at you if you can't look at yourself with respect and have a lil backbone. Girls, no guy wants a girl that hangs her head low all the time and wont smile once in a while at him. Be somewhat aggresive and go and get what you want!

 lol ive never had a girl friend in my life..... im always to shy around girls add to that the fact that i know im not good looking.... so i have no advice to give in fact if anyone has any advice for me let me know.