NOAH AOC

Hi,
I was just reading this today and roared as I read it. I found it in the NOAH publication "To Ride the White Rainbow"

Been There/Done That by Helen Denette
Walked into the racks in stores that don't have to merchandise all the way to the front.

Nicked your nose on corners of glass shelves.

Excused yourself to post, statues, floor models and vacum cleaners.

Sat on cats, sharp toys, and you child's peanut butter sandwich.

Oohed and aahed over the cute baby in the carriage, only to find out it's a Teddy Bear and the Mom is holding the baby.

Recognize everyone in the neighborhood until, she dyes her hair, he buys a new jacket, and the kids start whizzing around on roller skates.

Waved to, smiled at, yes and even hugged people who turned out to be total strangers.

Started to get in the wrong car when someone is picking you up.

Mispronounced words because you couldn't see the letters.

Sang the wrong words in the hym book.

Noticed that those near you could read you speaking notes while you could barely see them.

Fell up the stairs, into potholes and over door sills.

Glanced in the mirror and thought you looked pretty good (for a sixty-three year old) until you put your magnifying glasses on and saw all those lines.

Your family knowing their dinner will consist of what you can see in the store at your eye level(mine is four foot ten so we often have interesting meals).

And what you've missed seeing, gory accidents, people's scowls, Graffiti, bad TV commercials, road kill, aging lines on others faces, faces, your mother-in-laws cooking, dust on the end tables, cobwebs in the corners, the waitresses' thumb in your soup.

I just loved it. Among some of the outstanding things I have done is
Waved to the fire hydrant thinking it was my aunt standing on the corner.
Picked up a garter snake thinking it was a package of M&Ms.
Sat in spilled tomato soup on a chair in the school cafateria.
Going into a pasture to pet what I thought was an adorable full sized fench poodle only to have a friend scram at me get out of there. It was a young buffalo.
I actually have a dent in the corner of my head from bumping into things.
Just reading her poem I can feel the pain of sprained and once a broken ankle.
Brushed my teeth with what I thought was a toothpaste sample only to find out it was my husband's hair gel.
Couldn't figure out why the scrambled eggs kept bubbling and doing it twice only to find out what I thaught was cooking oil was yellow dish detergent. Jack roared at that one when baffled I asked him what he thought was wrong with the oil.
Oh here's a good one on a "dream date" in Puerto Rico thinking I was Cinderella flicking ashes into a peanut dish I thought was an ash tray.
This could be sad if you think about it but boy when I think about it I can really have a good laugh. Maybe some others could post and tell some funny things that have happened. Have a really great day.
Yours truly,
Margaret Mary Campbell

[This message was edited by Margaret Mary Campbell on September 05, 2002 at 06:32 PM.]

I have most the population of California thinking I'm mentaly retatrted, because I go out with make/hat/sunglasses and never say a word to employers. I've even been a fire look-out. Used the distance seeing equipment to read the maps INSIDE. Now I've given up on equality, and am tired of walking/faling/fallowing people around till' I'm sure there who I think they are, and have took up TRYING to get along with boyfriends to help me and my kids out. My twins learned how to read and respond quickly by reading road signs and navigating for me. Use to pull them out of school if I had to go somewhere new. There in fith grade grade and now know mom's not insane, just creative.
Now at 33, old and cranky, just tell people, like at Deli's and fast food; don't give me an attitude, I'm not stupid, just don't see well. No longer embarrased to crawl over the grocery store floor reading labels-i just glare at the "perfect PTA mom's and it scares them to another section
Had to share this. Been off site for two months, but have new lap top-thanks to best friend called VISA. As usual no job. Do have boyfriend- seems like same as job?!?!

kori

Fun thread.

OK, walked into a wall carrying a bird in a cage from the housing room to the testing room, busting my glasses in the process, and setting my research back about 3 months.

rode my bike into a parked car at age 6.

Asked a student about how her work was going (thinking she was my TA). She went on for about 5 minutes, then introduced herself, not my TA...

Put on the wrong coat at many parties...

swigged beer from a bottle full of cigarette butts...

Then again, I've caught students cheating on tests, which gives me a perverse sense of pleasure 'oh, you thought you could cheat 'cuz your prof is blind eh?'

Playing pool with friends and psyching them out by saying 'if you beat me, you beat a legally blind guy, so no big deal. If I beat you, you got beaten by a blind guy.'

Playing goalie in a pickup hockey game, making a glove save, and then looking the shooter in the eye and saying 'you know, I'm legally blind'

Dave

OK, here's my favourite, though I forgot to post it yesterday.

We came home from a night out and noticed that the babysitter had done the dishes. We thanked him. He's a really good kid, one of my students, so we sat down and talked for a bit over a beer or two.

'You know, when I was doing those extra dishes your daughter said that we should do all of them, even the clean ones.'

'why?' I asked.

Apparently my 9 year old said 'My Daddy did the dishes, but he did a really bad job because he can't see very well, so let's surprise Maman and Daddy by doing them right'

Kids rock

Dave

I loved these stories they are great! It brought back a funny memory of mine. One time I was at the shopping plaza and my mother and I had gone into separate stores. I was looking for her in all the stores. Then I glanced back in Jo Anne Fabrics and there she was. I started calling Mom! Mom! It was a small store so I was getting aggravated that she didn’t respond as I got to the back of the store. I said, “Mom what are you doing?” Just then I realized that it was my reflection in the mirror at the back of the store that I was calling too. A couple people chuckled and I laughed and left the store. I never denied looking like my mother again. Until that day I thought that I resembled my father but I guess not. LOL

Hi everyone, I wanted to share an embarrassing story that my fiance' (who has Albinism) shared with me, for you. He was about 12 or 13 years old, and was at a Summer Camp. The Camp had separate showering facilities for the boys and girls (in 2 different cabins,) and my fiance', who had just fallen into a big mud hole, went to go get a shower and accidentally went into the girls' showering cabin by mistake! There wasn't anyone in there when he went in, so he didn't know he was in the wrong place, and he started taking his shower. Right in the middle of bathing, a group of girls walked in, screamed bloody murder, and ran out. He figured it was some kind of prank and just went about his business, but the girls went and got a couple of boys to go in and tell him he was in the wrong showers! He then had to quickly finish his shower, and scramble to get dressed. As he came out he said he was absolutely mortified, & of course then had to endure all the teasing & taunting throughout the rest of his time at camp. Unfortunately, a bunch of kids that he went to school with, as well as a couple of his friends were there at that camp, so he said it took years for him to live that down!
I laughed at first when I heard him tell this story, but after he finished I felt bad for all the years of humiliation it caused for him. I wanted to share it with all of you that would understand....
~davengar

You might be an albino if:

You always order Combo#1 at the drive thru because you can't see anything else on the menu.

Lori did this for years until i got her a very cool Sony scope that she keeps in the van now.

rpb

Hi Davenger I have blundered into the wrong restrooms too, just like your fiance. Once in high schood I was talking to some friends, girls and guys. Anyway this big gust of wind blew in and some how dust and pieces of dead leaves got into my eyes. I staggered into the nearest restroom to flush out my eyes. While I had my head burried in the sink I heard the shuffle of students in the restroom. I reached up for the paper towel dispenser and BAM! To my shock I realized that it was a...well..it was a "femenine napkins dispenser". Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. As I turned, much to my embarrasment and saw two female students staring at me in disbelief. I grabbed some papertowels and bailed the scene like a bat out of ... the infernal regions.

RichardB, regarding ordering the #1 combo. I too memorize the menues, that is I rember the things I know I will like and just walk in and order by memory because the menues are too small. What is a Sony Viewcam that you mentioned in your post?

One more thing...Has someone ever asked any of you if the bumpy lane markers on the highways meant for braille driving?

Jaime
jaime440@aol.com

Mayomutt:

Hi,
I was just reading this today and roared as I read it. I found it in the NOAH publication "To Ride the White Rainbow"

Been There/Done That by Helen Denette
Walked into the racks in stores that don't have to merchandise all the way to the front.

Nicked your nose on corners of glass shelves.

Excused yourself to post, statues, floor models and vacum cleaners.

Sat on cats, sharp toys, and you child's peanut butter sandwich.

Oohed and aahed over the cute baby in the carriage, only to find out it's a Teddy Bear and the Mom is holding the baby.

Recognize everyone in the neighborhood until, she dyes her hair, he buys a new jacket, and the kids start whizzing around on roller skates.

Waved to, smiled at, yes and even hugged people who turned out to be total strangers.

Started to get in the wrong car when someone is picking you up.

Mispronounced words because you couldn't see the letters.

Sang the wrong words in the hym book.

Noticed that those near you could read you speaking notes while you could barely see them.

Fell up the stairs, into potholes and over door sills.

Glanced in the mirror and thought you looked pretty good (for a sixty-three year old) until you put your magnifying glasses on and saw all those lines.

Your family knowing their dinner will consist of what you can see in the store at your eye level(mine is four foot ten so we often have interesting meals).

And what you've missed seeing, gory accidents, people's scowls, Graffiti, bad TV commercials, road kill, aging lines on others faces, faces, your mother-in-laws cooking, dust on the end tables, cobwebs in the corners, the waitresses' thumb in your soup.

I just loved it. Among some of the outstanding things I have done is
Waved to the fire hydrant thinking it was my aunt standing on the corner.
Picked up a garter snake thinking it was a package of M&Ms.
Sat in spilled tomato soup on a chair in the school cafateria.
Going into a pasture to pet what I thought was an adorable full sized fench poodle only to have a friend scram at me get out of there. It was a young buffalo.
I actually have a dent in the corner of my head from bumping into things.
Just reading her poem I can feel the pain of sprained and once a broken ankle.
Brushed my teeth with what I thought was a toothpaste sample only to find out it was my husband's hair gel.
Couldn't figure out why the scrambled eggs kept bubbling and doing it twice only to find out what I thaught was cooking oil was yellow dish detergent. Jack roared at that one when baffled I asked him what he thought was wrong with the oil.
Oh here's a good one on a "dream date" in Puerto Rico thinking I was Cinderella flicking ashes into a peanut dish I thought was an ash tray.
This could be sad if you think about it but boy when I think about it I can really have a good laugh. Maybe some others could post and tell some funny things that have happened. Have a really great day.
Yours truly,
Margaret Mary Campbell

[This message was edited by Margaret Mary Campbell on September 05, 2002 at 06:32 PM.]

 

I know this is a really old thread, but I cam eaccross it the other day and fell off my chair laughing!!  For those of us with albinism who are old enough to appreciate it, it is so true!  For those of you who are parents to young kids, don't worry--most of us end up laughing at these hilarious situations.  For me, I have two excuses--albinism and the fact that there are several females on my mom's side that seem to have inherited the 'clutz' gene!!

So here is one to add:

You know you are an albino when your mom, who always has bread on the table with dinner, puts a plate with slices of angel food cake on the table, but neglects to tell you that is what it is.  I took a piece, buttered it and tried to eat it!  Yuck!!  Gross.  When I realized what I had done, I asked her why she didn't tell me--she replied she thought I knew what I was doing as I certainly seemed confident in what I was doing!

Joni

I love hearing these stories,they make me feel better about myself. Here's a couple of mine.

Walking through the parking lot on a spring day,I saw what I thought was a  bird  fly in front of me only to be told it was a large butterfly.

Walking through the grocery store directly into a pole with my cart, the cart took most the brunt.

Easter weekend admireing the neighbors many colored tulips that had just bloomed only to relise they had tied Easter eggs to there front bushes.

 When I was very little having a complete conversation with my Aunt when I thought it was my Mother.

Kathleen

 

Oh my, so totally can relate.  My husband reads the menu every time for me.  Only for me to always order the same thing.  I just want to dnow that I have more options though!

Morning: Pre-Coffee- was using hotel/travel sized bath products, reached for the blue one and took a big ol' swig of hand lotion instead of mouthwash!

I have a couple of them myself:

Almost ten years ago, I was hanging out at the mall in the arcade, surprising someone with a strong shoulder grab, whom I thought I knew, only to immetiatley realize that I didn't know this person at all. In my embarassment I rushed to the other side of the arcade, and of course he followed me pointed fingers and pushed until I finally let him know I was visually disabled.

A few months ago I ran into the post office for my fiancee, as I came back out it was evening twilight, and other cars parked in the parking lot with there bright headlights on I didn't even noticed the handicap parking sign, and walked full force into the pole, knocking the wind out of me, leaving me dazed, confused, and seeing stars.

Back in H.S. I was rushing out to get on the bus, with all my books in hand cuz I couldnt see my locker or the combo, and slipped on black ice, doing the classic movie spill onto my back, books flying everywhere. In my shock and embarassement I just laid there for a little while....

I made the mistake of playin volleyball back in my school days only to get a spike in the face from the back row. Or to swing at it, thinking I got it to only have a mouthfull of valleyball.

Back when I like 6 or 7 I was running around the gym and ran full force into my teacher...

Not that long ago, I accidently walked into the ladies bathroom at my local Walmart. Only to realize i was in the wrong bathroom when I noticed a little girl next to the sinks and hi talled it into the mens rooms, hiding my face, hoping that no one noticed me.

And many other little things, like misjudging steps, falling up and down them, misjudging depth, squinting to see and people thinking I'm giving them the evil eye, etc 

 

Ok so I to have a few...............

Well when I was younger I did not see the screen to the sliding door was not open and well seeing my mom I want to run to her knowing I was not a loud to run in the house I walked fast right in to the screen falling to the ground and yes they all saw me.

 

When I was in high school I was walking in a winter day I always went in to school early to set up my CCTV and get it in to class since I had one that I took up and down stairs. Well my cuz got off with me and she tried to yell back black ICE but it was to late I slipped and everyone on the buses who were waiting to go in saw me to top it off I had a mild concussion that made me way dizzy and had to have someone take me to the school nurse. That we I first told her when I came in told me I was fine.

 

When I lose my mom in the store I use to call out mom mom mom but now I call her name and she come around to racks and say why you are calling me that I would tell her because you don't answer to mom lol.